Okay, so you guys are back again seeking for what’s new in my column. Well actually this month was an ad-venturous trip for me, deciding which ad to rip off, because there were soooooooooo many of them. Finally, I locked on this Garnier ad. First of all, if you haven’t seen this ad , go ahead (because why should only we suffer :-P) :
So laughing your asses off already? NO stop. Because I’ll make you laugh even more. Just kidding. No seriously.
To begin with, isn’t it ironic/weird/weirdly ironic, that youtube is showing an ad before we can see the actual ad? Ad-ception much! After like 5 seconds, our ad actually begins (I am assuming you guys are smart enough to skip the pre-ad just after five seconds).
There are like 6-7 hard working blackish brown Biharis (racist jokes to be pardoned – Justice Katju) trying to pull a truck, or push a truck or just pretending to do some such thing, maybe because they weren’t paid well enough. Well, nevermind. So clearly they were failing to do so, just like any other Bihari would’ve. Then at 0:09 a modern young girl, wearing shorts and a long bra with appropriate cleavage to attract everyone’s eyes comes out of nowhere in that village. The two old aunties were staring at her cleavage, exactly like any other aunty in India would’ve stared. I suppose if the ad was a bit longer, they would have even shown the aunties conversing like “Gupta ji ki beti ko to kapde pehenne ki tameez hi nahi hai”, “Haan uski ma bhi to bhaag gayi thi shadi ke baad, aise hi sanskaar mile hoge bechari ko, iski kya galti isme”, etc. But fortunately, they didn’t dig in deep, unlike us. At 0:14 they showed a guy, staring at her cleavage, again. Come on, this was expected now, I am not going to explain how perverted Delhi guys are, or Mumbai guys, or Bangalore guys, or any other guy, or every guy is, for that matter! And there was a girl standing beside the guy, with shades larger than her face and buttocks. Her expression was something you’d have on your face after seeing Akshay Khanna, Anil Kapoor and an owl having a threesome. Hair hair everywhere, not a face to see.
Then the main girl goes, shows some more cleavage, ties her hair around the truck and dafuq happened? Yes you saw that too. The truck started moving. People present there were flabbergasted. For a sec, even I looked at her hair, rather than the cleavage. This was unbelievable, and it still is. Not a single hair fell. The knot was stronger than Ambuja Cement. The labourers were crying, because their boss fired them and hired her. People celebrated because it was an act which was a rare sight to behold. Everyone applauded. The next moment I was at Big Apple buying that shampoo because who doesn’t want such hair, man! I’ll become Hairman or something. It’s a superpower, goddamnit. So, yes I suggest all of you to buy this shampoo, right NOW.
Moral of this ad:
Look closely at 0:17, they are throwing lemons at your screen, so yes, moral is: When life gives you lemons, you squeeze them in your shampoo and call it Garnier. Because HAIRMAN! FTW!